Boarking's blog sans reader: 2011

Friday, August 19, 2011

Blues saying "We are the black & red"

Boarking's back with a footy post!

In celebration of Carlton fans wanting an Essendon win this weekend even more than the 'Dons fans do, Boarking Songwriting Services has been re-writing footy theme songs so that all fans can sing from the same song sheet.

(For those not aware of the finals permutations: a Bombers win in Perth would be nice, but not necessary for stitching up a spot in the top eight for us, however, a loss by West Coast is pretty much crucial for Blues to cling on to a top four spot. It hurts all Blues fans [included in their number is my better half, Esmeralda*] that they'll be barracking hard for the Dons but barrack they will!)

So here we go:

See the bombers fly up, up
To help win Carlton the flag
Our boys who play this grand old game,
Striving for the Blues glory and fame!
See the Bombers fly up, up,
To help the Blues to the four,
Carlton try their best,
But they won't get near,
Unless the Bombers fly up!

*Clearly not "better" in her choice of footy team

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Friday, March 25, 2011

When Charlie & H. were the bee's knees

A bloke sent me one of those emails that do the rounds, perchance to raise a giggle. This one got me thinking:

The fact that society functioned perfectly well with heaps of people quaffing addictive (but legal) drugs every day, would seem to suggest that it’s not the drugs, but the “War on drugs” that is the problem in our time. It’s not so much that the “cure” is worse than the “disease”, but that the “cure” is the “disease”!

Alas, it's one of those areas where good sense can never be allowed to intrude on policy, but until it does we'll all continue to pay the price -- corruption, health costs, crime, organised crime, terrorist funding, 3rd world narco-economies, etc., etc. -- and all so we don't (shock horror) "send the wrong message".

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'Why Our Great-Grandparents Have Such Fond Memories Of Their Youth...'

A bottle of Bayer's 'Heroin'.
(I'm surprised that they remember anything!!)
Between 1890 and 1910 heroin was sold as a non-addictive substitute for morphine.
It was also used to treat children suffering with a strong cough.
* * * * * * *
Coca Wine, anyone?

Metcalf's Coca Wine was one of a huge variety of wines with cocaine on the market.
Everybody used to say that it would make you happy and it would also work as a Medicinal Treatment.
* * * * * * *
Mariani Wine

Mariani wine (1875) was the most famous Coca wine of it's time.
Pope Leo XIII used to carry one bottle with him all the time.
He awarded Angelo Mariani (the producer) with a Vatican gold medal.
* * * * * * *
Maltine

Produced by the Maltine Manufacturing Company of New York .
It was suggested that you should take a full glass with or after every meal.
Children should only take half a glass.
* * * * * * *
A paper weight

A paper weight promoting C.F. Boehringer & Soehne ( Mannheim , Germany ).
They were proud of being the biggest producers in the world
of products containing Quinine and Cocaine.
* * * * * * *
Opium for Asthma

At 40% alcohol plus 3 grams of opium
per tablet, it didn't cure you,
but you didn't care...
* * * * * * *
Cocaine Tablets (1900)

All stage actors, singers, teachers and preachers had to have them for a maximum performance. Great to 'smooth' the voice.
* * * * * * *
Cocaine drops for toothache

Very popular for children in 1885.
Not only did they relieve the pain, they made the children very happy!
* * * * * * *
Opium for new-borns

I'm sure this would make them sleep well (not only the Opium, but also 46% alcohol)!
It's no wonder they were called:
'The Good Old Days'!!
From cradle to grave....
Everyone Was Stoned!!!